


Okay, This Sounds Bad

by IrisofParadise



Category: Daredevil (TV)
Genre: Crack, Everyone lives, I am forever in denial, M/M, sounds like sex but isnt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-08
Updated: 2015-11-08
Packaged: 2018-04-30 14:30:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5167319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IrisofParadise/pseuds/IrisofParadise
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Foggy over hears Matt and Vladimir but it's not what he was expecting. And he is thankful. But he is still going to hit Matt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Okay, This Sounds Bad

**Author's Note:**

> Really, there just needed to be one of those 'It sounds like they're having sex but oh hey they aren't?" fics for mattimir. There needs to be every cliche fic for them honestly. I'm sorry I'm a loser. Ignore me.

"Ow! Vladimir stop!" 

"Nyet, you were moron enough to do it so sit still and let me finish, mudak!"

Foggy stops with his hand on the door knob as he hears Matt and Vladimir argueing. ' _Okay, I'm sure it's not what it sounds like. Matt would not be having sex in our office where I or Karen or a client may come in at any given moment_ ,' he thinks to himself, wondering how Matt doesn't hear him. 

"Okay, stop. Stop, stop," Matt hissed out breathlessly, "before Foggy or Karen show up! Stop Vladimi- ah!" There's a sound of skin slapping skin and then a groan and muffled words and Foggy's jaw drops. 

"Nyet! I'm almost done! Stop fighting with me!" Vladimir also sounds breathless, his accent thick and the words are almost spat out in an annoyed tone. 

And now Foggy is almost seeing red because God have mercy on Vladimir if he is hurting his best friend. Never mind the fact that Matt can take care of himself, Matt is his injured duck and Foggy will not let Vladimir hurt him. 

"Foggy and Karen are going to be here any minute!"

"Then hold still so I can finish, mudak!"

Matt lets out a groan. "Foggy is going to kill me if he sees."

Foggy twitches, his hold on the doorknob tightening. He's so focused that he doesn't hear as Karen comes up behind him. 

"Foggy?" She whispers and can't help her small giggle of amusement as he jumps and almost yelps. But she frowns as Foggy claps a hand over her mouth. 

"Shhh! They'll hear you!" He hisses.

They listen and can still hear Matt gasping for breath, the sound of skin against skin, Vladimir groaning a bit and muttering in hushed Russian.

Karen's eyes widen as she turned to give Foggy a look. He just gives a nod. 

"Vladimir enough! Stop!"

"Nyet! Not done! Stop your fucking whining!"

"It hurts," Matt whines out and Foggy can almost picture Matt giving a pout.  

There's a scoffing noise and then, "You get punched in face every night. You can handle this. Don't be baby."

Matt lets out a groan. "You're not exactly the most gentle person," he states dryly, almost breathlessly.

"I don't care. Now stop moving!"

And Foggy decides that enough is enough and throws open the door. "I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT YOU TWO ARE- ...bandaging Matt's wounds? What?"

Sure enough, Matt is sitting on Karen's desk, shirt off, with Vladimir standing between his legs as he gives Matt stitches and cleans some of the more shallow cuts littering Matt's chest. 

"Moron got thrown out window last night," Vladimir states with a scoff before dabbing, probably a bit more harshly than he should have but in his defense it's too early in the morning to be functioning let alone bandaging wounds. 

Matt let out a groan between clenched teeth at the sharp sting but quickly tried to calm himself once more. He turned to where Vladimir was and gave a glare. "You're doing that on purpose," he accused. 

Vladimir gave a smirk. "Da. Now, hold the fuck still and let me fucking finish!"

Karen let out a muffled giggle as she watched the couple. "I think I'm going to make coffee. Anyone want any?"

"Da."

She gave a nod and turned to head towards the small kitchen area to make the pot. She didn't hear as Matt whispered softly for just Vladimir to hear, "You really don't. She always burns it. Go to Starbucks if you really want coffee."

Foggy watches as Vladimir nods and finishes with the stitches. "So you two weren't having sex?"

Both men turn to give him confused looks. 

"Is too early for sex," Vladimir states at the same that Matt asks, "Why would you think that?"

"No reason," Foggy answers back dryly. He frowns as he remembers Matt saying how he would kill him if he saw... He remembers how bruised and battered Matt's chest is. And it clicks. "Oh my God, Matt!"

"Huh?"

"You got thrown out of a  _fucking_   _window_?! I'm going to kill you!"

Matt winces. "It wasn't the first time, Foggy."

"That does not make it any better!"


End file.
